Humanoid Nature
by melancholy starlight
Summary: Android!GLaDOS, Human!Cores, Aperture and also the world are alive and well. ChellDOS. Humanoid Nature is an AU in which GLaDOS is a little more willing to accept the humanity inside herself. In building a genuine, loving relationship with Chell, she learns to listen to her conscience and make up for past mistakes.
1. The cake is a truth

**Before I start the chapter here's a little intro thing to hopefully better explain this AU.**

 _Chell: A silent survivor of Aperture's portal testing. When she completed the tests, she eventually befriended GLaDOS and now they're dating and pretty much live together._

 _GLaDOS: In charge of testing at Aperture. In it for the science. Ranges from sassy to dangerous. Originally a result of an experiment on building an effective humanoid/android body for an AI. After the experiment was declared a success, she was made an employee and, as a supercomputer, she has access to more Aperture files and information than anyone else. Not nearly as murdery as canon, but still not particularly fond of humans for the most part._

 _Wheatley: A scatterbrained but kind-hearted intern at Aperture. A friend of Chell's but often finds rivalries against GLaDOS._

 _Aperture Science: Doing science and still alive. The section of it featured in the fic is mostly under GLaDOS's control. The sector of Aperture that GLaDOS controls does encompass rooms and hallways long forgotten by its current employees and which even The Important People don't know about. However, these rooms, hallways, and abandoned test chambers are decorated with paintings and messages from an ex-employee said to have lost his sanity. The reason I point this out is for a future chapter or two._

 _As a whole, this AU is essentially a universe in which GLaDOS 1) is an android, 2) doesn't kill all the scientists, and 3) becomes more willing to listen to her conscience. Also, Human!Cores. I don't know why I couldn't think of that wording when I first wrote this chapter._

 **Ok that's all, here's the chapter**

Chapter One.

"The cake is a truth."

ooo

The sun crept higher over the cityscape, spreading its luminous rays across numerous buildings, workplaces, and homes alike. Among them, a cozy apartment: visually similar to the others around it, but whose inhabitants made it unique. Similarly, the morning in the city began like any other. However, in this little home, this Friday was to be a very special one indeed.

For starters, the dark-haired woman lying in bed was still asleep and it was shortly after 8. Indeed, on days when she didn't have to be at any certain place at any certain time, Chell had quite the tendency to sleep in.

This tendency was good news for the slender, white figure standing outside. Shoulder leaning against the door-frame, this feminine figure couldn't help letting out a silent chuckle of admiration as she gazed lovingly at the sleeping Chell. She didn't dare let out any sound, however—she was highly intent on letting Chell sleep as long as possible. At this point in time, GLaDOS figured she had at least a couple of hours to prepare before Chell woke up.

Today was Chell's birthday. And her girlfriend was determined to make sure it was a good one. She deserved it—after all, she'd spent the last one in a test chamber at Aperture. There hadn't even been any cake.

GLaDOS was both created and employed by Aperture Laboratories, a center of scientific research and testing which, as she was living proof of, had not only successfully put together an AI based on the consciousness of a living person, but also was able to build a flexible, functioning, damn-close-to-human-looking body to implement said AI into. The resulting character was GLaDOS—she was highly intelligent, she was highly powerful, and she harbored an undying, fiery passion for science. Just as she had been programmed to be.

These days, she was in charge of Aperture Science's Enrichment Center, where she controlled testing of the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device. And one year ago, she had been overseeing these tests on one particularly determined, resilient subject.

 _Chell._

The way Chell responded to those test chambers—the way she solved problems, the way she never gave up trying to find her way out, even when everything including GLaDOS was working against her—you just had to appreciate how well she worked as a test subject. Behind those shimmering silver irises, you could see the gears turning in her head, seeking out a solution even when she was told there wasn't one. And she'd found her way out of that chamber, too. GLaDOS had been amazed.

Now, though, GLaDOS didn't have time to be admiring Chell. She had work to do, and only a couple of hours to do it. Thankfully, she had help. Not her ideal help, but help nonetheless. She could work with that for a few hours, probably. A quiet knock at the door drew her attention. Behind it stood a young man with bright blue eyes, holding a cardboard box of some sort in one hand and adjusting his thick black glasses with the other. (What is it about Wheatley that made every last one of us agree that he had glasses?)

GLaDOS wasn't exactly excited to be working with Wheatley, but she'd rather not do it alone, and no one else was both willing and available. Begrudgingly, she slapped her hand down on the doorknob and yanked it open for him.

"Good morning!" he chirped with a beaming smile.

GLaDOS impatiently skipped the pleasantries. "I need to get started on the cake as soon as possible. Here's a list of everything I need _you_ to do. I made sure to write down every last detail, so maybe even _your_ microscopic mind can understand it." She was eager to get him out of the way. She handed him a sheet of paper and then set about gathering ingredients in the kitchen.

"I didn't come here to be harassed, lady," Wheatley said, immediately growing impatient and making a point out of dropping the cardboard box on the table. "I'm here to help you. Honestly, I dunno what I expected when I agreed to do this for _you_ of all people, but I'm doing this for _her!_ " He gestured to the closed bedroom door. "I'm helping you for the sake of my friend. I'm doing you a _favour,_ and all _you_ ever do is insult me! Belittle me! I'm not putting up with it today. Not a chance. I'm taking this list, and I'm leaving."

"...That's literally what I asked you to do. You haven't won," GLaDOS remarked, tipping a cup of flour into a bowl. Wheatley gave up trying to respond and slammed the door behind him as he headed out to run the errands on the list.

The list.

The door hesitantly cracked open again and one hand timidly reached for the sheet of paper on the countertop next to the door. Then the door was shut tightly again.

GLaDOS chuckled quietly to herself. "Moron."

ooo

"I can't believe she had the nerve to… to BULLY me, when I for once was trying to HELP her! I mean, we're supposed to be on the same side here! We're both trying to give our friend a happy birthday, you'd think we could at least TRY to work together on this…"

Wheatley continued to mumble to himself as he shoved a shopping cart down the aisles, scanning the shelves for the items listed on the page in GLaDOS's comparatively tidy, cursive handwriting. Then, suddenly, he stopped in his tracks, letting the cart roll lazily another couple of feet forward.

"Actually, if she's not going to cooperate, why should I? I could do this on my own. I don't need her. I don't need anyone! I'm perfectly capable of it; she doesn't know what she's talking about!" He strode forward with a renewed energy, ignoring the other shoppers who stood staring less-than-subtly at the man angrily rambling to himself. An hour later he burst through Chell's front door with such confidence and noise that he momentarily forgot Chell was still asleep.

ooo

GLaDOS stood in a corner of the living room, assessing her work. Blue and orange streamers hung intertwined, brightening the soft grey of the walls. Confetti was carefully strewn across the table ("Our last bag," GLaDOS had lamented to herself), and a little box, wrapped up with the utmost precision and a rainbow ribbon on top, sat in the middle of the table, where more gifts were planned to join it. And the cake, of course, stood on the counter-top on a raised dish, ready to be frosted.

As she began the delicate process of decorating the cake, GLaDOS pondered how unrecognizable this sudden eagerness to express her appreciation of someone was. She usually expressed disapproval, if not outright hatred. But her admiration for Chell ran so deep that she was almost an entirely different person. She hated to admit it, but deep inside, she could be incredibly affectionate and caring.

It was at this point that her thoughts were rudely interrupted by a chaotically loud slamming of the door.

"I'm back and I've done everything all on my own!" Wheatley announced. "That's right; no help whatsoever, how's that for helpless little mor—"

" _Quiet!_ " GLaDOS hissed, "if you wake her up I swear to God. I still need more time, so put the boxes on the table and then DON'T. TOUCH. ANYTHING." She turned back to her work as Wheatley made his way to the living room, setting a couple of bags on the coffee table and busying himself with wrapping a gift in silvery tissue paper.

For a moment, GLaDOS thought everything was going fine for once. She was sort of amazed, honestly—Wheatley and quiet were two things that typically did not go together, as much as she wished they did.

"Aaaaugh!"

She'd mentally spoken too soon. She let out an exasperated sigh as Wheatley began, "Oh, God, that hurts… was not expecting that. I swear, that doesn't normally happen… Uh, 'scuse me? I hate to interrupt, 's kind of embarrassing to be honest with ya, but, ah… I've cut myself on the tape dispenser and now my finger's bleeding."

GLaDOS just covered her face in her hands and sighed. "Can you do ANYTHING by yourself without screwing up?" she retorted, not even bothering to comment on the perplexing and endlessly inconvenient fragility of the human body as she typically would.

" _Why_ are you always so insistent on being mean to me? I've been trying to help you all day. Really, we're on the same side. Working towards the same goal. I'm trying to be patient here. I am. But the very moment I happen to need help, I'm still being called out?" His tone shifted from hurt to angry. "You know what? I've had it. I'm done. I'm not putting up with this anymore. I'm going to take care of it myself. Good. Day." With that, he stormed out the front door, slamming it behind him.

GLaDOS didn't particularly care where he was going or even whether he was going to come back. Or, at least, she didn't _want_ to care. It was certainly no secret that she wasn't particularly fond of him, but she knew if Chell had been watching, she would've wanted GLaDOS to apologize.

And, sure, GLaDOS had to admit that maybe she had been a little harsher than she needed to be. It _was_ just one minor issue. She glanced back at the door and sighed. Couldn't be helped now. She set about putting the finishing touches on the cake, and then headed into the living room to tidy up what was left in there.

Behind her, she heard a door crack open. She froze, frantically glanced over her shoulder. No, it wasn't Chell. Wheatley was back already.

"Let it go so soon?"

"Left my phone on the table," he explained. "I'll get out of your way quick, I promi—"

"Wait," she interrupted before he could turn around. "I need you to stay here." She took a deep breath as she began to formulate her sentences. "My… my singular goal today is to make Chell happy. She'd want me to be less cruel to you, at least for today, and admittedly I've been unusually irritable this morning. I'll try harder to cut back."

"...Really?" Wheatley couldn't tell whether or not she was simply deceiving him again.

"Really," she confirmed.

"That's…" He couldn't find the words. She was really trying to be less mean?

"That being said, I absolutely don't regret anything I've already said today. I still think you're an idiot. I'm just going to try a little better to keep it to myself today." With that, she stood up and left the room.

Aaand there it was. Wheatley knew better than to get his hopes up in that regard. But he could live with this.

He turned around, and who should he find standing in the bedroom doorway but Chell, wearing a blue T-shirt and some plaid pajama pants and smiling at her girlfriend.

"Oh, hi," GLaDOS said, trying to hide her surprise at Chell's sudden appearance. "Did you… hear all that just now?"

Chell nodded. _I'm proud of you,_ she signed.

GLaDOS smiled.

"How long have you been listening?" Wheatley inquired.

 _I heard the door shut loudly. It woke me up,_ Chell explained.

"Oh… sorry 'bout that. My mistake," Wheatley said.

 _It's okay._ Chell smiled softly.

"Well, now that that's out of the way… happy birthday!" GLaDOS wrapped Chell in a warm embrace and planted a kiss on the taller woman's cheek. "I've got a special surprise for you. Well, multiple surprises. Start with this one." She picked up a small grey envelope sealed with a pink heart-shaped sticker and handed it to Chell, who opened it carefully so as not to tear anything.

The little card inside had a message from GLaDOS, typed in one of those fancy calligraphy fonts that there are far too many of. It read:

 _Dearest Chell,_

 _You have been cordially invited to attend Aperture Science's first annual Bring Your Significant Other to Work Day next Friday starting at 9am. We promise it will not end in chaos. Additionally, test chamber doors will remain locked the entire day. That means no one will enter. Tours of the offices and control rooms will be offered._

 _If you accept this invitation, please look up and give an indication of agreement or satisfaction._

 _I love you._

 _~GLaDOS_

Chell looked up, her sparkling silver eyes meeting GLaDOS's golden gaze. She smiled.

"Well…?" GLaDOS asked hesitantly.

Chell stepped forward and flung her arms around her, planting a kiss on the side of her face. In all honesty Chell had been rather intrigued by GLaDOS's work, and though she was hesitant to approach those test chambers again, she trusted GLaDOS now that she would be safe.

"I'm glad you're excited. I am too..." GLaDOS was almost whispering. "Happy birthday, _mia cara._ "

ooo

 **Author's Note: Wow, a chapter of decent length! Maybe my writing skills are actually growing!**

 **Anyway, as you can clearly see, in typical me fashion I'm approximately 8473646 years late to the Portal fandom, but I'm just so undeniably in love with GLaDOS that one of the first things I did was draw a design of android!GLaDOS which is what this AU is based on. You can view some pictures of her HERE:**

 **[instagram] /p/BfP0cXjnrBW/**

 **and HERE (this one isnt her normal outfit):**

 **[tumblr] post/171471339084/i-drew-this-pic-of-my-androidglados-the-other-day**

 **I've got over ten more chapter ideas for this little fic, which is sort of amazing 'cause normally I can only write one-shots, so if you are interested in it there's plenty to look forward to, and if you're not, well, every browser has a back button.**

 **I'm sure you're not here to listen to me ramble about my writing, but I'm looking forward to writing more. I'm still learning how to actually write these characters, and chapters do take awhile, but a lot is in store and I can't wait to see it exist!**

 **Till next chapter,**

 **melancholy starlight~**


	2. Say apple

**This chapter's been sitting drafted in my notebook for a couple weeks now. Here you go.**

Chapter Two.

"Say apple."

ooo

Chell woke up the next morning with the same thoughts she had every After-Birthday-Day. It was funny, she pondered, how different it felt to add one year to your age, and yet you felt no different from how you'd felt the day before. Children often imagine that so many things change as you age from one year to the next, but they wake up the day after their birthday the same person they had been twenty-four hours ago. Indeed, Chell didn't feel any different than she had yesterday, or the day before.

She did, however, feel a whole lot different from how she had felt a year ago.

See, a year ago she'd been crossing test chambers in a pair of Long Fall Boots, with a portal gun in her hands and determination in her eyes. When they woke her up after putting her through some shady-sounding preparation for the tests, she'd been guided - and taunted - by a mysterious computerized voice that seemed to come from everywhere, echoing off of every wall and somehow always seeming to know what Chell was doing. Meanwhile, all Chell had wanted was to get it over with. She'd long forgotten why or how she had become a test subject. By then, all she knew was that she wanted to get out. And the only way out was to test her way through the chambers. So she tested.

It was around this time that she had stopped talking. She had never been a woman of many words, but in a place like Aperture's Enrichment Center, it felt like no one would hear you anyway. Or rather, that no one would _listen._ So she stopped trying. If she needed anything, she could do it herself. Meanwhile, a tiny, remote part of her brain worried that she might never find the end of these test chambers, might perish in this dangerous, enclosed place and fall silent in a much more permanent sense.

When she finally escaped the Enrichment Center, she hadn't quite found the courage to speak again. She _could_ speak, of course - her vocal cords had sustained no damage. But she didn't exactly want to. Not yet. Even before Aperture, she didn't speak much. So after an experience like that, she didn't bother trying to bring herself to talk. Maybe a part of her still felt that no one would listen?

Now though, things were different. She had grown to trust the voice she once dreaded. She had grown to understand that voice's intentions and mistakes and flaws, and forgave those mistakes. She had begun to distance her experiences in testing from the rest of her perception of Aperture. She had friends. She had a girlfriend. She had her freedom. She was safe.

Chell knew she didn't have to start speaking again. But recently she'd noticed that she sort of wanted to. Through GLaDOS, she had begun bringing attention to the safety of testing, and wanting to make it so that future test subjects would not have to live the way she did during the tests. Chell was using her experiences to inspire change, change that was actually in the process of happening. She was beginning to find her "voice". So, she thought, why not rediscover her literal voice as well?

The task had proven easier said than done. Last week, she'd sat alone in her room, writing a list of words and attempting to read them out loud. But she couldn't quite get herself to make any sound. She wasn't sure why. Maybe she was still a little afraid.

Today, she decided, she was going to change that. She rolled out of bed and grabbed her phone from its resting place on her nightstand. With determination powering her heart, she opened up Messages and tapped out a short message.

 _[Conversation: Chell + Wheatley]_

 _Today - 9:17 am_

 _Chell: hey_

 _Wheatley: Good morning!_

 _Chell: I need to ask you a favor_

 _Wheatley: Of course! Anything for a friend ;) What do you need?_

 _Chell: I want to try something but I need your help. Could you come by here?_

 _Chell: If you're busy, that's okay. It's not urgent._

 _Wheatley: Of course I can help!_

 _Wheatley: But wait, why isn't Miss Bossy-boots Queen of Aperture helping you...? :p_

 _Chell: She's working on a project or something, she isn't home right now._

Chell considered adding, "Besides, I sort of wanted to keep this a surprise for her", but decided against it. She knew all too well the trope of "weak reverse-psychology only raises suspicion and lets the secret out". Especially considering that's exactly what happened last time she explicitly told Wheatley that she was working on a surprise.

 _Today - 9:20 am_

 _Wheatley: Ok, I'm on my way!_

 _Chell: Thank you._

ooo

About twenty minutes later, Chell left her room in a clean shirt and a newly-tied ponytail, just as a knock at the door resonated down the hall. She opened the door to let Wheatley wander in. Standing about a foot above her and smiling brightly, he greeted her: "Hello there! I'm ready to help! Wait, what - what is it that you need, exactly? Should've asked that."

Chell still hesitated to tell him outright. But she had prepared for that. She reached across the counter and handed him a note she'd written.

 ** _I want to start talking again. I've tried a couple of times, but I couldn't get myself to do it. I thought some positive feedback from a person I trust might help encourage me._**

Wheatley's eyes flickered across the slip of paper and then widened. "Oh, I see! You're still hesitating to bring your voice back, yeah?"

 _I guess so,_ Chell responded. _I don't think I will go all the way back to talking. I had always been pretty quiet anyway. But talking can be convenient too, sometimes. I used to be comfortable with it._

"That makes sense, I suppose," Wheatley said, then paused. "Wait. Does _she_ know you're wanting to do this?"

Chell froze. She hadn't wanted to say anything, but...

 _No._ Her hands hesitated. _GLaDOS doesn't know. I'm not ready yet._

"Has she ever heard you talk before?"

 _Once. After that I was too afraid to do it again. But I think that's different now. Will you help me?_

"Oh, right! Of course. Sorry, got a bit sidetracked, didn't I? Of course I'll help, I said I would. Where would you like to start?"

 _You've got lots of experience with talking,_ Chell semi-teased. _Where do you think I should start?_

"Er, well... let's start with something easy? Better off startin' you with something like 'apple' rather than, say, 'antidisestablishmentarianism' or something, right?" Chell let out a small laugh. "Yeah, let's try 'apple'."

Chell inhaled deeply, trying to prepare herself for what would be her first word in a year. She tried not to let that air go - you need air in order to speak, after all - but once she opened her mouth to make a sound she still found herself being held back. By what, she didn't really know. Some sort of internal hesitation, one that she'd felt before. She grew tense, her body and mind freezing up like a computer assigned too many tasks to complete at once.

"There's no pressure," Wheatley assured her. "Just one little word, no big deal. No pressure, no time limit, no worries. You've got this." Yes, he remembered. Positivity, encouragement. "It's alright. You can do this."

Chell closed her eyes, breathed out, breathed in again. Just one little word, she told herself. Simple. She opened her mouth again, poised and ready to make the "ah" sound. She let out a little air, then froze. She'd done it, she'd started.

"A-ah..." Her voice was quiet, a little raspy. It probably needed to get accustomed to being used. But it worked.

Wheatley's face lit up, anticipation replaced with pride. "That's it! Keep going! You can do it, say 'apple'!"

"Aah..p..."

"Yes! You're so close, you've got this!"

"A-app... uhll. Apple."

"YES! You've done it! Well done!" Wheatley cheered.

Chell felt satisfied with herself. She did it. She said a word, out loud, with her voice.

"D'you wanna try another one? Are we moving too fast?"

 _Let's do another,_ Chell confirmed.

"Would it be too self centered to ask you to try my name?" Wheatley joked. Chell laughed a little as Wheatley interrupted himself: "Actually, why don't you try yours? It'd be helpful for, y'know, introductions and whatnot. Go on, try it."

"T... uh, sh... agh!" She hadn't _forgotten_ how to form that sound, per se, but it had been awhile since she had had to do so. "Sh- ch. Che...ll."

"You did it! You're picking this up fast."

"Heh." Chell smiled. _Like I said, I've done it before. I haven't really forgotten how to do it. I just have to get used to how it feels._

"Right, of course," Wheatley said. "Let's try a few more. Starting to get comfortable with it?"

Chell nodded, beaming. She began to question why she had been so afraid. She guessed that seeing how much she could do made her more eager to do it - and more excited for the surprise she wanted to plan.

As time went on, Chell began to enunciate with more speed, clarity, and confidence, as Wheatley began to give her entire sentences and eventually an entire paragraph. Within a span of about twenty minutes, she'd gotten from "apple" to "Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube" to a brief introduction of herself until finally they both heard the rattling of a key in the lock at the front door.

"Oh! Sh-shh! Act natural, here she comes," Wheatley said.

The door was pushed open and GLaDOS appeared behind it, a heavy-looking bag slung over her shoulder. She brushed her chin-length hair behind her ear as she began to call, "I'm back - what is _he_ doing here?"

"Oh. Hello! I was just, ah, helping Chell with a little something. That's all, nothing major. Don't mind me," Wheatley babbled innocently.

GLaDOS looked semi-suspiciously to Chell, who nodded and then quickly began signing, _How was your morning?_

"It wasn't particularly eventful. We made solid progress, though. On that note, next Tuesday they want to take me two states over for a presentation. My guess is they want to show me off."

 _I don't blame them,_ Chell grinned.

"Ha! Anyway, I'd be back Thursday morning. Are you alright with that?"

Chell nodded.

Wheatley stood up. "Well! I suppose I should be going. Nice to see you, and I'll see you later?"

 _Thanks for your help,_ Chell smiled and waved. _See you later._

After he left, GLaDOS turned to Chell. "What was he helping you with? Actually, what COULD he help you with...?"

You'll find out, Chell assured her. Don't worry about it.

"..." GLaDOS was still unconvinced, but decided to let it go, at least for now. _She's planning something. What is she planning._ she wondered internally.

ooo

 **Yay, I finished a second chapter of something! That hasn't happened on this account in probably years!**

 **I've got the basic idea of the next couple of chapters all planned out. I can't say I'm excited to write them, but MY GOD AM I EXCITED TO SEE THEM WRITTEN. (There's a key difference.) It's things like these that remind me why I am so shamelessly posting this fic. Because I personally love this kinda content.**

 **I'm still learning how to write these characters, and now I get to insert things for Chell, so that's... fun? Speaking of which, I mentioned that Chell has spoken in front of GLaDOS exactly one (1) time. I drew a little comic page of it. It's not online yet, but you can have the satisfaction of knowing it exists. I might hold off on posting it until I have more of them to help tell my AU's story clearly.**

 **Anyway, enough of my babbling. Please give me feedback, I would love to hear from you. I know I'm talking to the void, that's pretty much all I have ever done on the internet. but if there's someone else floating across the void I'd like to hear their opinion.**

 **Thanks for reading!**

 **~melancholy starlight**


	3. A home of science and art

**hmmm this one feels a little disorganized but im a lazy mess so it is what it is, heres the "take your significant other to work day" chapter.**

Chapter Three.

"A home of science and art."

ooo

GLaDOS spent a majority of her time in Aperture's facility. It felt almost more like home than even Chell's apartment. She was created here. She worked here. As far as anyone was concerned she lived here, though she was free to leave and go to other places when she wasn't working. Aperture was where she was comfortable. She was eager to share this major part of her life with Chell.

And Chell was eager to see it.

No, seriously. Ever since Chell had escaped the chambers, GLaDOS had expressed a genuine desire to know Chell as a person, to be forgiven, that hurting Chell wasn't her intent although by nature of the tests it was more than likely. She couldn't explain what drew her to Chell, but it was too strong to ignore. She hadn't realized it before - feelings were complicated things, weren't they? - but she liked Chell. Genuinely.

And so Chell had given her a second chance.

She'd kept her guard up, those first several weeks after forgiving GLaDOS. But over time, GLaDOS had proven herself, proven that she really was sorry, she really had learned, kept her promise to let no Aperture-related harm come to Chell from then on. By then, Chell had noted that, as it turned out, GLaDOS really did have the capacity to care about something other than her own science. It didn't go unnoticed, the effort that she made to ensure that Chell felt safe and comfortable, that there were accessible exits to every place they entered, and that changes were made to future test designs to make them less life-threatening and honestly more functional. As Chell had put it, "If you are testing how well a certain person can use portals to solve puzzles, any other method would be less lethal and more effective at motivating them." And she'd been right, GLaDOS had realized. It was, after all, sort of hard to guage someone's portal-puzzle-solving ability when they were too busy shuddering in fear in the corner to even solve one. Aperture couldn't argue with that, and so they substituted less life-threatening hazards.

As she participated in making this change, GLaDOS had to notice how unusual it felt to care about making people less likely to get hurt. She didn't tend to _do_ that, or at least she hadn't before. It was strange. She cared about Chell, she was fascinated by Chell, and it was because Chell had explained what testing had done to her that GLaDOS cared at all about how safe it was for the test subjects.

GLaDOS didn't like to admit how much she cared about certain things. At her core (pun possibly intended, I can't decide) she was meant to do science. But she was, after all, based on a human's consciousness. And not a terrible human, either. A decent one. Humans were complex. And was it not the nature of a decent human to care about other people?

GLaDOS pondered this and more as she led Chell down a pristine white hallway, their footsteps echoing down the empty path as they passed closed window after closed door, until finally arriving at an open elevator.

"We're going to head down to the main Enrichment Center. Some of it might be familiar to you, so just be prepared for that," GLaDOS explained to Chell. "We actually put all testing on pause for today, though, so we won't go to the testing tracks themselves. But I can show you the observation rooms, the Extended Relaxation Center... and after that we can go to my chamber. How does that sound?"

Chell nodded in confirmation, offering a half-smile. The elevator began its descent and within a few moments the two were released into another white hallway. This one wasn't empty however; signs and photographs decorated the walls, the lights were brighter, and a man in a green button-down was there to greet them.

"Goooood morning, ladies~" he said, a bright smile shining above a light brown beard. He looked to Chell specifically and remarked, "Hey, haven't seen you around in awhile. Your name's Chell, ain't it?" Chell nodded. "That's right, you were pretty amazin' to watch in there." The man gestured to the closed door behind him, which Chell assumed meant it led to a testing area. "Always nice to see your pretty face again. Name's Rick. Why don't you and I-"

"You'd better watch yourself," GLaDOS interrupted, glaring at him. "She's _mine._ Now, _please_ tell me you and Floyd didn't burn down the Enrichment Center this morning."

"Nope. Everything's running smoothly, ma'am. No errors in the Extended Relaxation Center or anythin'. We're doin' just fine."

"Oh, good. I need you two to keep it that way. That should be simple enough, since there isn't any testing."

"Yes, ma'am!" As he turned to leave, he stole one last glance in Chell's direction. "See you around, beautiful~"

"And stop flirting with my girlfriend!" GLaDOS yelled. Taking Chell's hand, she whispered, "Ignore him. This way to the observation rooms."

The observation rooms were well provided with windows and computer monitors to watch test subjects. Office chairs and camera screens alike were left empty and silent today, though. "Most of the people who would be taking notes in here are probably making fools of themselves in the lounge..." GLaDOS explained. "But aside from them, the core test observation team - that's Floyd and Rick - they're usually over here." She gestured to a pair of desks situated across from each other through an empty doorway. As GLaDOS described the things that usually happened in this area, Chell took a look at the desks.

On one, a stack of slightly crumpled papers lay strewn, while on the wall a collection of hastily-scribbled sticky note reminders provided a disorderly splash of color to the otherwise monochromatic room. An array of photos were also taped to the wall, many of them depicting exciting landscapes or intense action scenes.

On the other desk, a tidy notepad and pen lay perfectly parallel to each other, and the first page read: "Tungsten has the highest melting point of any metal, at 3,410 degrees Celsius. Hot water freezes quicker than cold water. The first person to prove that cow's milk was drinkable was very, very thirsty." The desk was decorated with little else aside from a framed photograph of a man in a light purple polo shirt smiling smugly at someone else, whom Chell recognized to be Rick.

"Well. I've run out of things to say about this place." GLaDOS said after a minute or two. "Would you like to see my chamber?"

Chell nodded, and held out her hand so GLaDOS could lead the way.

As the couple stepped off the elevator and turned a corner, Chell caught sight of a strange, dark-looking passage where the wall, bathed in a dim red light emanating from an unknown source, seemed to be covered with... something. She didn't have the time to figure out what. Before she could get a closer look, they had turned another corner and a door opened up to a spacious chamber surrounded by moving panels and computer monitors.

"So, this is it," GLaDOS announced. "I know it looks dim at the moment, but give me one moment." She stepped onto a round platform in the center of the room, where a series of wires and machines and metal hung in a cluster from the ceiling. She casually snatched up a couple of wires in one hand as a small panel, barely visible most of the time, opened up in her back. In one swift motion, she connected herself to the complex contraption, and almost immediately the room sprung to life. The lights turned up and the monitors began to display data and camera feeds.

"Ta-dah~!"

Chell stood in the elevator doorway, applauding with a soft, admiring smile on her face. They both let out a light laugh.

"Once I'm connected here, I have access to camera feeds, schedules, past experiments, years and years' worth of scientific research... just about everything Aperture has to offer."

Chell gazed upward in amazement. The grand machinery before her lifted GLaDOS slightly above the platform on the floor, such that she appeared to be floating. She could move quickly and beautifully, elegantly gliding across the edges of the room.

The room itself gave Chell a mysterious vibe. This expansive chamber was capable of controlling so many things - the possibilities were nearly limitless, it seemed - and yet it also felt like if you took the wrong turn, being here might mean you were going to have to come up with outrageous escape plans or otherwise say a painful goodbye to being alive. Interesting.

"Why don't I show you?" GLaDOS said, saving Chell from a bizarre train of thought she didn't want to stay on. "I'll pull up the camera feed for the lobby." She swung herself around to a monitor that indeed began displaying a live video of the front desk.

"Now the Extended Relaxation Center..."

and a series of vacant bedrooms appeared.

"Employee lounge..."

and a room with tables and sofas filled the screen. A few employees were standing face to face; specifically, Chell could recognize Rick and the other man in the photo she'd looked at. In the distant corner of the room, only partially visible, Chell faintly made out Wheatley's face. Beside him stood a young boy, maybe 12 years old, who was currently clinging tightly to Wheatley's left hand. They both looked worried. Rick and the other man looked upset; it seemed like Rick was yelling.

"Oh my god," GLaDOS sighed, mildly annoyed. "This again."

On the video feed, Chell saw Wheatley hurriedly lead the young boy out the door as the other man seemed to poise himself to throw something.

"What is he doing? Hold on," GLaDOS mumbled. "Stay here. I need to stop them before they destroy something." With that, she landed lightly on her feet, disconnecting from her wires and sprinting out the door. Yes, Chell was worried about the two people fighting, and curious about the boy with Wheatley, but most of all she thought, _Wow. GLaDOS looks really cute when she's running away._

As her girlfriend disappeared from view, Chell found herself alone in a massive, technologically advanced room she couldn't operate with a feeling she couldn't shake from her core that seemed so real it was as though in an alternate life she had been here before. Her chest filled with an uneasy sensation as reality seemed to alter in a liminal-space sort of surreal way.

She decided to take a peek into the hallway and take a breather.

When she stepped outside, a flickering light caught her eye. Below it, she saw a darkened pathway beyond which all the lights seemed to have died. She decided to investigate. _Does GLaDOS know about these places?_

As she stepped under the flickering light, her eyes fell upon a painting. A mural. _Who left this here?_ It couldn't have been a test subject. Only employees had access to these hallways. The drawing seemed to depict the chamber Chell had been standing in only moments ago. The same devices and monitors were illustrated, but over them lay a shadow. A face was visible in the darkness, its eyes red but otherwise... strangely familiar. The smaller faces surrounding it were frozen in absolute terror.

 _Is this supposed to be GLaDOS? ... My GLaDOS?_ Though she knew the central core was much kinder to her than nearly anyone else, and Chell wasn't particularly well-versed in Aperture's history, it simply didn't seem like this depiction was accurate.

Intrigued by this discovery, Chell left this secluded corner and wandered the halls, wondering if she could find another drawing like this. She found a window a short distance down the hall whose cover wasn't completely lowered. She ran up to it and took a peek through the glass. She could see a spacious, rectangular room that appeared to be an abandoned test chamber. On the far wall, past a raised platform with curved steps leading up to it, another illustration was indeed visible. Again, she could see a simplified depiction of GLaDOS's chassis. Below that, a small drawing of... a human. An unusually familiar-looking human.

 _Is that me?_

Small white ovals surrounded the painting, red lines emerging from their centers, easily recognizable to Chell as sentry turrets. _I know she endangered me, but she's told me time and time again that it was because it was part of the test... This is making it seem like all she wanted was to kill me. But she didn't. That's not her, that's not what she's like._

Chell continued staring at the painting. Whoever this artist was, they seemed intent on portraying GLaDOS as some dangerous... monster. Chell knew GLaDOS wasn't really like that. Sarcastic? Absolutely. Simply mean-spirited? Sometimes. But a monster? No, never.

Chell then realized that GLaDOS probably did know these paintings were here. They were pretty close in proximity to both each other and GLaDOS's chamber, it would be hard to ignore these mysterious little corners of the facility. Especially considering one of these paintings was in a test chamber. Chell couldn't imagine what GLaDOS thought about these illustrations. She hated to think that they might be acting as a harsh, unforgiving reminder of past mistakes.

 _I am going to fix these paintings._

She didn't when, she didn't know how she would get to them all, but in half a second she had already made up her mind that it was going to happen.

"Find something you like?"

Chell yelped in surprise at the sudden presence of a voice behind her. She turned to find GLaDOS standing behind her. _What happened with the guys?_ she asked her.

"I got it sorted out. They both went home for the day. The real question is, what are _you_ doing?"

 _There's something painted on the wall in there,_ Chell explained.

"Oh... that?" Almost immediately, Chell sensed a change in her partner's tone. Her eyes lowered, her voice got a little quieter, more self conscious. "There are several of them around the facility. It's... not important."

Chell's instinct was to call out just how unconvincing that last statement had been, but she didn't want to force GLaDOS to talk about it if she didn't want to. So she said nothing.

"Anyway, I was thinking it was about time to head out. You probably need lunch, anyway."

 _Let's go._ Chell offered a comforting smile and wrapped an arm around her girlfriend, and the pair walked out of the facility together, both carrying a hint of sadness in their hearts, but each hoping to help the other forget her worries for a short while.

ooo

 **whoooo feelings!**

 **i have to admit that the "chell fixes the paintings" idea came from a post on tumblr, specifically post/168772931533/chelldos-hcs-masterpost-go**

 **so shoutouts to them for inspiring me**

 **now, this is where i would say i've got a sort of reference sheet of several of the characters in this AU and you can look at it right HERE, except there is no "here" because there's one character i haven't drawn yet. i plan on putting the picture online once i do, but the best way to know when i do is to follow my ig ( ) and tumblr (melancholy-starlight). i typically leave some sort of indicator that anything related to this AU is related to this AU, so just keep an eye out.**

 **[update: the reference sheet i drew is now online on my art blog melancholy-starlight-art on tumbles. search for 'humanoid nature' in my tags, it will be under that.]**

 **until next chapter,**

 **~melancholy "Really Needs to Go to Bed" starlight**


	4. Long distance

**Hey! Today's Portal 2's release anniversary! (April 19) So the completion of this chapter is very well timed! enjoy!**

Chapter Four.

"Long distance."

ooo

For GLaDOS, traveling was a heck of a ride.

See, nobody really knew how an airport might accommodate her. Would they regard her as a passenger? She didn't exactly have the same sort of identification you would have if you were a typical human citizen. So if Aperture ever needed to bring her somewhere, they made sure it was within driving distance.

But then, of course, GLaDOS wasn't exactly a licensed driver either. So someone had to do it for her. To her, it was bad enough that she had to admit to depending on someone for such a simple thing as that. She was used to being in control and she was used to being self-reliant. But she also had to sit and do nothing, enclosed in a relatively small space, with these people for several hours. She couldn't say she was looking forward to it. But she would deal with it.

Before she left on Tuesday morning, she and Chell made some final preparations as well as a warm, loving goodbye. Enveloped in Chell's soft embrace, GLaDOS near-whispered, "I'll see you in two days. Don't destroy everything while I'm gone. I love you."

 _I love you too._

And then GLaDOS had to go, and Chell went back inside, and the Aperture group drove away, and Chell was on her own, left to work on her computer in silence. It stayed that way for a couple of hours, with GLaDOS desperately trying to ignore the people around her, and Chell desperately trying to finish her project as fast as she could. In fact, just as she was closing the program with a sigh of relief...

 _Knock-knock._

The sound grabbing her attention away from her screen, she shoved her laptop to the side and jumped up to open the door. Behind it, she found Wheatley smiling brightly (to which she responded with a greeting smile of her own).

"Hello!" he chirped. "Chell, I'd like you to meet someone." He stepped to the side, creating a dramatic reveal of a young boy standing behind him. The boy had shaggy, light brown hair and was carrying a backpack printed with a galaxy pattern. He looked up at Chell and smiled.

"This is my little cousin, Phoenix," Wheatley said. "Phoenix, meet my friend Chell."

"Hi Chell," said Phoenix. "I'm Phoenix. I like space."

Chell smiled and waved in response. Phoenix turned to Wheatley and mumbled, "She's quiet."

"Yeah, and you're talkative," Wheatley responded plainly.

"No, _you're_ talkative. You talk a lot. More than me. Hey, what are we doing? Are we gonna go somewhere? Where are we going?"

"Chell asked me to come and take her to Aperture for a... special project she's planning. She needs my help there."

"Do I get to come? I wanna come. I wanna watch."

"Well, fortunately for you, I'm responsible for you at the moment, so you get no choice but to come."

"Yaaay!"

ooo

The child continued to chatter to himself the whole way to the facility. "Hey. The moon. I see the moon. You can see the moon during the daytime. Look, it's the moon." He didn't seem to mind that no one was listening or responding. Maybe he didn't even notice.

"Phoenix's parents are out of town this week and they've left me in charge of him," Wheatley explained to Chell as they walked into the facility. "If you ask me, maybe don't go on week-long trips if you can't bring your child with you, but I will be honest, I don't mind having him around. And, you know, they think I'm responsible enough to take care of him- _don't open that door, Phoenix!"_

Chell giggled. _You're doing a good job._

The group found themselves in a hallway situated between testing tracks. Wheatley gestured to one side. "Alright, there are a few of those painting you asked me about in this testing track, if you'd like to take a look."

The door opened, and as Chell stepped inside, she could see on the far wall a depiction of a test subject surrounded by turrets. She pulled a sizable bag off her shoulder, set it on the floor, and rustled through it a moment. She knew exactly what she wanted to do. She unpacked a set of paints and brushes and got to work. She began with several long, sweeping gestures across the top of the painting, letting passion (and a general knowledge of what she was aiming to do) guide her hand. Within several minutes, she had surrounded what had originally been a scene of fear and threatening with a musical staff, a brighter atmosphere, and the words "cara mia addio" which swirled around the edges of the scene like a length of ribbon. The simple sketch of a test subject was now smiling. The red light of the turrets even looked less intimidating, which was amazing, because Chell hadn't changed anything about the turrets.

She took a step back and grinned, satisfied with her work.

Chell hadn't painted in a long time. Not for any particular reason, she simply hadn't gotten around to it, and then the tests happened, and since then nothing had brought her back to it until now. Nothing like surprising your girlfriend to motivate you to pick up your paintbrush, Chell thought. A playful, excited part of her demanded, _Do another!_

Chell pulled her bag up, carrying her still-wet tray of paints in her hand, and walked swiftly, and with such a lightness and energy that she was almost bouncing, out the door. Wheatley, who had been watching Chell work through the window, was now leaning against the wall. As the door re-sealed itself behind Chell, he asked, "Ready for the next one?" She nodded, and they began to make their way down the hall. A hall Chell vaguely recognized as being close to GLaDOS's chamber.

As they walked, Phoenix, unable to let silence linger for too long, suddenly inquired, "Why are you doing that? Changing those paintings, I mean. Why are you doing that?"

Chell and Wheatley exchanged a glance. Chell shrugged. "Well, uhm... You know the lady in charge of all the testing? GLaDOS?" Wheatley hesitated briefly at the name, but that went unnoticed.

"The one who made those two guys stop yelling at each other? I remember her. Who's she?"

"Well, she's in control of a lot of Aperture Science, and a long time ago some very dangerous things happened, unspeakable things, and people got hurt. Lots of 'em did. Not the greatest part of Aperture's history, that. Anyway, people started finding out about it, and they were afraid. They were afraid of _her,_ too, because she's in charge of testing and she's the one who was letting all that happen. They say, that's when these paintings started appearing."

"So why is she changing them?"

"Well, GLaDOS does things differently now, things are a lot less... murder-y. And Chell didn't like how these pictures were painting GLaDOS in such a negative light. _Literally,_ painting her in a negative light."

Suddenly, Chell began to speak. "I know GLaDOS. She isn't a monster."

"Chell says she thinks the paintings have got some sort of... psychological effect. Something about past mistakes and self-perception, I don't remember all that you said, sorry 'bout that. But that's why she wants to change 'em."

Chell nodded. "The message of those pictures is making her upset. I can tell. And I love her too much to let that keep happening."

Aw, that was sweet-

"Wait. You love her? Are you dating? Is she your girlfriend?"

"Phoenix!"

"Yes, she is," Chell responded calmly.

"Cool." And then Phoenix found something else to look at. "Moooon! The moon, I see the moon. SPACE!"

He wasn't wrong. On the ceiling in the chamber ahead, there hung a drawing of the phases of the moon. He ran over to the window, pointing in the drawing's direction and poking the glass.

"Wait, look at that wall," Wheatley called to Chell. "There's another painting of her, too."

Chell remembered this one. This was the one she was looking at last week, the one with a test subject that was undeniably meant to be Chell herself, somehow. The moment the door opened, she ran in and dashed across the room to get a closer look.

Standing a few feet away from the illustration, she paused, staring at the terrified expression of her painted counterpart. Gazing into the threatening, unforgiving eyes of an AI she barely recognized. She almost couldn't look anymore. She sighed. One thing at a time. Lifting a paintbrush, she mixed together a few quick colors and with only a few brushstrokes softened GLaDOS's expression, transforming it into a faint, anticipatory smile. A quick splash of blue made Chell's painted eyes bright and calm and curious. _And now,_ Chell thought to herself, _the best part._

She'd figured the best way to fix the bad things was to replace them with good things. For example, happy memories or a song GLaDOS wrote. And she'd thought of a fairly recent happy memory that would be perfect here. Within a few short minutes, the new version of the painting showed an arm outstretched from GLaDOS's silhouette, offering a piece of cake on a plate to the curious human ahead. Chell grinned and wrote under the plate," Truly amazing."

Chell paused for a moment. There was something else she wanted to do. Finding a blank space on the next wall over, she began to sketch an illustration of her own. No, two of them, but meant to be reflections of each other. On the left, GLaDOS stood facing a monitor, a microphone, and a keyboard; her hands were held in position to type. On the right, GLaDOS stood facing Chell, hands reaching out to meet Chell's, and both of them smiling. Above the first image, Chell added the words, "For Science." Under the second picture, she wrote, "For Love."

She looked over her work again, setting her paintbrush down on her tray. _She's going to love it. No doubt._

ooo

"Years ago, Aperture scientists began a project aiming to upload a human mind to artificial intelligence. We called it the Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System, or GLaDOS, and this is what we ended up with," Aperture's CEO told the audience. "Come on out, GLaDOS."

GLaDOS fought the internal urge to respond to "come on out" with "fine, I'm gay" as she made her way up the steps to the stage. She wore a dress with a flowy, white skirt under a soft black sweater, and the side of her hair that she usually pinned back now hung loose at the side of her face like the other side did. She almost sparkled in the eyes of everyone watching, and the audience's applause fell silent as she approached the mic.

She talked for a short while about her role in the facility and in the test designs. Then she talked about herself, her origin and how she worked. That was really all she needed to talk about. She spoke with clarity and resolve, but inside, there was something she wished she could discuss instead. But here wasn't the place. So she kept talking about what these scientists had come to hear, and when she was done she sat back down.

She didn't mind talking in front of people. Technically, it was part of her job. There was no performance anxiety or anything. She didn't mind the presentations. She sort of liked being shown off. She knew Aperture was proud of her, of having created her, and she knew she was, after all, rather impressive.

But there were a lot of things she could say to that many scientists, to that many people, and she couldn't tell whether or not she wanted to say them, or if she should say them, or if she wanted to stay quiet and lie by omission, and she had a lot on her mind suddenly, and she didn't know what to do, or what she wanted to do, and she didn't know, she just missed Chell.

Chell...

As quietly and inconspicuously as possible (so as to avoid advertising to the whole room that Not Only Did She, An Android, Have A Phone, But Also She Was Using It Right Now Instead Of Watching The Presentations), she typed out a text message to Chell.

[Conversation: GLaDOS + Chell]

Today - 7:51 pm

GLaDOS: Hi.

Chell: hey! [insert heart emoji]

Chell: how is the presentation

GLaDOS: I just got done talking. Everything went smoothly. I don't mean to brag, but they LOVED me.

GLaDOS: Now I'm thinking about you. I miss you.

Chell: I miss you too.

[A minute passes.]

GLaDOS: I should have asked if you could come, I'm thinking about things and it would be better if you were here.

Chell: Is something wrong? are you okay?

GLaDOS: I'm thinking about being honest (for once) about the testing issue. Certainly not here and now, but eventually. I want to apologize.

GLaDOS: But I don't know if I should. I don't even know if I actually want to.

Chell: Admitting your mistakes is hard. But you've learned from it, havent you? and you've already made changes so those things don't happen again

Chell: If you keep it secret then no one will know. alternatively, if you're honest, you can still know that the current state of things is a vast improvement from the past

Chell: So it depends whether you want to be honest or not

GLaDOS: Hm. Then I guess I really HAVE learned a lot.

Chell: ?

GLaDOS: I think I actually do want to be honest.

ooo

 **oh my god finally i got the whole thing typed out, after losing all my progress to accidentally closing the tab. third time really is the charm, guys.**

 **anyway happy portal 2 release date anniversary, here's to 7 years of a game i haven't played but love to death. it's still a couple hours to midnight in my time zone as of typing/uploading this, so im not late!**

 **i've been having lots of ideas for this au and a few of them are introduced in this chapter, i'm really looking forward to them**

 **also? remember the "fighting the urge to respond to 'come on out' with 'fine im gay'"? that's definitely me. this fic is now a certified Melancholy Starlight Content [insert rainbow badge thingy]**


	5. Flashback 1: Second chances

**Welcome to the _first_ flashback chapter! These are going to be interspersed with regular chapters but clearly marked as flashbacks, so you'll know which ones are which. **

Chapter Five.

" _Flashback #1:_ Second chances."

ooo

GLaDOS was very good at ignoring her emotions.

Unlike a human, who just sort of had to deal with how they felt, GLaDOS had both the ability and the habit of shutting them down if she didn't feel like listening to them, which was most of the time. Human emotions were hard to predict, hard to control, hard to understand... And they could easily get in the way of one's work. Especially this kind of work. GLaDOS prided herself in doing her work efficiently, and if she listened to her feelings and morals every time they began to speak, she wouldn't be able to get anything done. Besides, she wasn't human. Not completely. She was human _oid_ at best, but really, she was an AI. She didn't want or need to listen to emotions. So she didn't listen to them.

Most of the time.

Yes, most of the time GLaDOS was happy to silence her conscience and distance herself from her humanity for the sake of her science, however ethically questionable it may be. But this time... she was having a hard time letting herself fall back on the easiest solution.

You see, the test subject GLaDOS was currently guiding through the chambers was a mysterious, silent, determined woman named Chell. Chell was an incredible test subject, far better than any other on record. You could see it in those silvery-blue eyes - she wasn't going to let anything in those chambers get in her way. Her outstanding performance and her tenacity had snatched GLaDOS's attention and weren't letting go.

But it wasn't just that. It wasn't just Chell's knack for solving tests. There was something else about Chell that set her apart in GLaDOS's eyes - and yet GLaDOS couldn't quite put her finger on what. But it resulted in a stubborn voice in the back of her mind that refused to let her ignore it the way she had every time before. A voice that called her to consider how Chell perceived everything around her. A voice that, upon watching the human woman hide in a corner in fear when she couldn't keep up with the test, called upon GLaDOS's deeply-buried, firmly-silenced empathy. And for whatever godforsaken reason, GLaDOS couldn't force that empathy back down.

She stared at the screen before her. In a corner of Test Chamber 12, an exhausted Chell lay sleeping with her head resting on her arms, and her portal gun always close by. Through the surveillance cameras littered throughout the chambers, GLaDOS watched over the resting woman, ensuring she could see her chest rise and fall with her breathing. _Poor girl,_ GLaDOS caught herself thinking. _I've tested her to exhaustion. Why are there no beds in there...?_

Any other time, if a thought like that entered her mind she'd follow it up with, _Who cares if there's beds? They're here to test._ But this time she thought no such thing.

A few days passed in this manner, during which GLaDOS spent most of her time watching Chell test, and the rest of her time pacing across her chamber trying to understand why she cared so much about Chell. It was almost funny, she thought. With the way she was constantly thinking about Chell, staring at Chell, hoping Chell was okay, wanting the best for Chell... it was almost as if she...

The thought that followed, stopped GLaDOS in her metaphorical tracks.

 _Am I in love with her?!_

What an utterly human mistake to make. Falling in love. _Come on, GLaDOS,_ she reprimanded herself, _you're better than this. You know better than to let emotions cloud your judgment._ Yanking her hair back with one hand and facepalming with the other, she sat in the middle of the room and tried to shut out her feelings once more, tried to convince herself that she was not in love with Chell, she couldn't be, she shouldn't be, she won't be, she was above letting human emotions control her. But then she stole another glance at the camera feed in Chamber 16 and thought, _Am I really, though?_

She watched Chell guard herself from turrets as she made her way through the chamber. Though fear was certainly visible on her face, she didn't let herself freeze up in panic. Dropping cubes onto the turrets from a portal, she cleared the path for herself more easily than any other test subject, and came out the other side in one piece. GLaDOS couldn't help but admire Chell's quick, resourceful thinking. How did she do it?

She had to wonder where it came from, because she barely knew anything about Chell's background. No one at Aperture did. Even if she were to look at her file, there was barely any information available. They had her first name and her age and when she showed up in Aperture and that was about it. Nothing about where she was from or what she did before she started the testing... nothing.

 _This poor girl,_ GLaDOS thought. _Barely anything left of her past, that we know of at least, fearful and exhausted in the present, and I of all people am in charge of her future... surely the least I could do is make her future a good one, right?_

GLaDOS could barely recognize her own thoughts. Her instinct would have been to reject them, but it seemed some entirely different instinct was telling her to let herself feel this way. She didn't know what to make of it. Her only course of action up to this point had been to ignore everything she felt, but that wasn't an option anymore. These feelings were too strong. They refused to be silenced.

She glanced back at the screen. _Oh God._ Chell had made it to Chamber 17. GLaDOS had to explain the test. She scrambled for her microphone, slamming the button down and doing her best not to let any trace of panic or embarrassment into her voice. "The Vital Apparatus Vent will deliver a Weighted Companion Cube in 3. 2. 1." On 1, she pressed a button on a panel labeled 17, which caused the cube to be released into the Chamber for Chell to grab. "The Weighted Companion Cube will accompany you through the test chamber," GLaDOS continued. "Please take care of it."

GLaDOS smiled at her screen. This was the only circumstance she was allowed to speak to Chell while the latter was in the test chambers. She watched Chell pick up the companion cube and use it to reach the higher platforms. And - _oh my god she patted it and gave it a kiss. That's too adorable._ GLaDOS couldn't help it - she giggled a little. Wait. Oh no, was she really still holding down the microphone button?!

God. This was why she didn't like letting herself care about other people. She'd get distracted and embarrass herself or mess up the tests, or worse. She'd have to keep this under control somehow.

ooo

A couple more days passed. Fortunately GLaDOS had succeeded in not letting her feelings cause her to make mistakes again. She still couldn't silence them, though. She'd wondered if maybe the emotion-silencing action was malfunctioning, but she could still silence other feelings like sadness and irritation, so it couldn't be an error there.

It seemed like the worst had become reality - being forced to face the human part of herself without a way of escaping it. The error wasn't within GLaDOS's programming. Her human basis, her conscience was done being repressed. Humans _were_ stubborn, weren't they? The one GLaDOS was based on was proving herself especially so, even in death, even when forced into an AI that wanted nothing to do with her. It was GLaDOS's nature to reject her human instincts, to insist that she wasn't human, not at all. She had a job to do, and she was going to do it. That was what she was for.

But the humanity inside of her was having none of that.

GLaDOS sighed. While pondering this, she had spent quite awhile now lying on the floor in the middle of the room, thinking so hard she was using more power than she was receiving. She'd been keeping an eye on the surveillance feed, but now she had to pull herself to her feet and reach for the microphone. Chell had made it to Chamber 19.

"Welcome to the final test," she announced. "When you are done, you will drop the device in the equipment recovery annex."

That would be it. Chell would finish the test, drop off her portal device, and then... leave, most likely. A sudden, unidentifiable, almost painful sensation filled GLaDOS's chest. No, that couldn't be all there was to it!

Well, technically it could. Maybe it would be easier to let her go and forget any of this ever happened. Of _course_ that would be easier. She would never even have to deal with it. And after all, the best solution to a problem was usually the easiest one.

Usually.

No. Not this time. This was the exception. The easiest route wasn't better this time. Or - or maybe it was, but... she'd be happier, at least, if she could talk to Chell genuinely at least once. She held the microphone button down again. "After you have deposited your portal device, an elevator will transport you to the central chamber." _There,_ she thought. _I can meet her outside my chamber, and we can talk._

 _... What will I say?_

ooo

Chell stood silently in the elevator as it ascended, taking a moment to let her mind catch up with the fact that testing was over. No more living in fear. No more sleeping on the floor because there was nowhere to rest. No more running from cleverly hidden turrets or narrowly avoiding falling in acid. It was over now. She could relax now. She could get out of this facility and go back to the regular world.

No. Not yet. That voice, the computerized voice that had led her through the tests, told her she was headed for the 'central chamber', wherever that was. Someone probably needed something with her. Maybe to tell her something. Maybe to get something more out of her. She didn't know.

The elevator came to a gradual stop and the door opened to reveal a long, empty, white hallway that ended at a spacious, dimly-lit room decorated only with a couple of platforms and several computer monitors giving off a bluish-white glow. It seemed empty. A heavy, eerie silence flooded the hallway. If it weren't for the evidently recent activity of these computers, Chell might have thought this entire area had been abandoned.

She looked around at some of the monitors, though none of them struck her as potentially helpful. She glanced back at the elevator door. Was she really in the right place? Was she supposed to be here? Should she go back?

"Wait!" A slightly panicked but otherwise familiar voice finally broke the haunting silence. "Don't go. I wanted to talk to you." Chell turned, and the face that gazed back at her was... not entirely human. This... woman? was small and slender, dressed in a black and white Aperture uniform. Her golden-hued optics held contact with Chell's own silvery blue eyes. She had short, asymmetrically-styled hair that was just as clean and snowy-white as everything in the facility. She reached a human-like but metallic-tinted hand towards Chell's shoulder, wanting to physically stop her from trying to leave, but paused when she realized she had Chell's attention. "My name is GLaDOS. I'm the one who's been overseeing your tests."

So she was the one who'd been doing this to her. Putting her in danger, watching her. Guiding her from time to time, yes, but also heckling her every now and then, as if it weren't bad enough that she was—willingly, it seemed—making it very clear how unsafe and unethical Aperture was. Chell instinctively raised her arms in self defense.

"I'm not going to hurt you," GLaDOS said. "I know you have every reason not to believe me, but I just want to talk to you. I want to get to know you. I know there's more to you than just how good you are at testing. I want to get to know you as a person."

 _She wants to be friends? After all this testing crap? Am I really supposed to trust that?_

Chell shook her head. _You hurt me,_ she signed, not knowing or caring if GLaDOS could even understand her. But fortunately, GLaDOS was a supercomputer with the greatest collection of knowledge seen by mankind. She knew every language the Internet could teach, without the months and years of studying. Including ASL.

"Yes. I did. I tested you, I taunted you, I endangered you, all for the sake of science, without any regard for your well-being. And I'm sorry for doing that to you." GLaDOS stared at the floor as the words pushed their way out. Chell got the impression she wasn't the type to apologize. She didn't know if that was improving her perception of this situation at all. Neither of them said anything for a moment.

"I'm being serious. I... really like you." It looked like she blushed, energy visibly rushing to her face. "I'm just terrible at dealing with it," she mumbled.

Chell didn't want to trust GLaDOS, but the way she had said "I really like you" had felt so different from everything she had ever said before. It felt more genuine. More honest. More... human.

"Will you give me a second chance?"

Chell didn't respond immediately. There was a lot to consider. Was she just supposed to pretend the testing hadn't happened, much less genuinely terrified her? Was she supposed to pretend everything was okay and be friends? Somehow, Chell knew GLaDOS didn't expect that much at all. Indeed, GLaDOS knew the whole testing situation had ruined her chances at a good first impression. She was hoping that she could prove herself despite it. And she didn't even really expect that. Uncharacteristically nervous, she looked down at the floor, then back up at Chell, watching the woman's expression for any suggestion of either malice or forgiveness.

Chell still felt that trusting GLaDOS, in most (if not all) situations, would quickly prove to be a mistake. But for whatever reason, she had a feeling that maybe that didn't apply this time. Chell knew she wasn't the most forgiving, but she was pretty sure she wasn't the least forgiving either. She wouldn't put her guard down just yet, but if GLaDOS really meant what she said, maybe it would be worth a shot.

Chell bit her lip. Anything she had to say now was not only sure to be heard, but was also being anticipated. She couldn't say nothing.

"Okay. But don't make me regret it."

ooo

 **Apologies for the wait this chapter. I don't really have an excuse. I don't know that I'd call myself busy as of late. I've been doing things, but they're mostly "sitting around the house playing video games" things.**

 **I actually started working on this chapter and the next chapter around the same time, so ch6 is about half done I'd say (if my word count patterns are anything to go by). So hopefully it won't take a million years for that to go up.**

 **Thanks for reading, constructive feedback is always appreciated, be nice to each other and stay hydrated, goodnight**

 **~melancholy starlight**


	6. Painted in a better light

**Here we are back in the present time! More flashbacks will come in the future, most definitely out of order. Maybe I'll put everything together chronologically at some point, but for now, the chapters are just coming as the inspiration comes, hehe.**

 **Also, major thanks to everyone who's been leaving reviews, particularly the guests I can't respond to! I'm glad you're enjoying it so far!**

Chapter Six.

"Painted in a better light."

ooo

For the rest of the night, and the day that followed, GLaDOS couldn't take her mind off the idea of making a formal, public apology for the Enrichment Center's past. For Aperture's less-than-ethical protocols.

Before, she wouldn't ever have thought of apologizing. Wouldn't have even regretted anything or seen anything to be sorry about. And perhaps that wasn't entirely her fault - she had been created and programmed in the likeness of the heart and soul of Aperture itself. Her moral compass had hardly been a compass - more like an Aperture logo.

That was different now. The morality in her core, the humanity in her heart had resurfaced and refused to go back down. And she was letting it stay. But this issue... oh, wouldn't it be easier to pretend nothing had ever happened? To never let it slip out to the public? That way, she - and everyone else at Aperture for that matter - could continue moving forward and never have to deal with the inevitable backlash.

 _Backlash that you deserve,_ something inside told her. _Do you really think you could leave this all behind and never face any consequences?_

She was still angry at herself for all the things she had let herself do. People had been hurt. People had died. And she'd let it happen, encouraged it even. For science. That had been her excuse. As if nobody at Aperture had learned anything from the repulsion gel, or the moon rocks, or frankly any of their experiments. GLaDOS cursed at herself mentally. How did she let herself take it this far?

Resting her head on her arms on a table in the corner, facing away from everyone else and tuning out the low chatter of everyone else, GLaDOS sat alone, in relative silence, letting regret sweep across the forefront of her mind and wondering how on earth she was to make it right. Because sure, she could act like it _was_ right. She'd _been_ acting like it was right. But it wasn't.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a voice. "Ma'am? Apologies for disturbing you, but you seemed upset."

It was Floyd. A short distance away, the rest of the Aperture group was still talking and laughing over drinks and snacks. Between not needing to eat, not wanting to socialize, and having her mind preoccupied since last night, GLaDOS had gradually distanced herself from the group - maybe unintentionally, she didn't know. But she was two tables away and upset with herself while the others were enjoying themselves, and that must have caught Floyd's attention.

"I'm fine," she insisted. "And don't touch me." She gently shoved away the hand Floyd had laid on her shoulder.

"If you continue to overthink complicated topics and remain upset for long periods of time, you'll wear yourself out. You could overheat. Please be careful." He spoke plainly and kept emotion out of his tone as much as he could (sort of like she did) but she could tell his words came from a place of genuine concern. He may not be much more to her than her employee, but he was still looking out for her, and though she'd never say it, that was something to appreciate.

"I'm fine, I'll be fine," she insisted again. "Don't worry about me. Just... go have a nice time with your friends."

"Aperture has spent years worrying about you. For numerous reasons."

That was fair.

"But alright. I'll go. Just remember we're all here for you if you need anything."

"You're the ones who need things," GLaDOS half-joked. Floyd rejoined the other Aperture employees and quickly got into a heated debate about mythology or something. GLaDOS wasn't listening anymore. She'd already reoccupied herself with trying to decide whether she valued honesty more, or Aperture avoiding public backlash more. Though she did keep in mind what Floyd had said, and tried to slow herself down a little.

ooo

 **Two hours later, a couple of states away**

Chell could hardly contain her anticipation. Normally surprises were GLaDOS's thing. But this - this was a _double_ surprise. And Chell couldn't wait to see GLaDOS's reaction.

Thankfully, it wouldn't be much longer now. She'd left her phone on, waiting in the messages app for a text indicating that GLaDOS was close. The moment Chell's phone displayed the words "About 30 min away", she'd nearly tripped scrambling for the door. But she'd caught herself, and soon enough she was on her way to Aperture, where the group returning from the trip was planning to stop first.

Soon enough, Chell pulled into the parking lot and double-checked that she had everything she needed. Phone? Check. Memory of where the paintings are? Check. Vocal cords...? Check! She stuck her phone in her pocket and headed for the door.

Inside the lobby, everything was extraordinarily quiet, the kind of quiet that makes you feel like you have to whisper even though speaking out loud isn't against any rules. Beyond the doors in the back of the room, new inventions were surely being design, created, and tested. Innovations and observations were made here every day. Just because a few people were traveling didn't mean everyone else got to slack off. And, of course -

"Oh, great! You made it!" A familiarly cheerful, accented voice echoed across the room. Chell waved energetically as Wheatley greeted her. "Oh, should - should I go back and turn the cameras on in the chambers? Because, ah, well, while you were on your way, I took the liberty of getting that done early. Everything in hallways and the chambers should be ready as well. Pretty simple, took me hardly any time at all."

Chell gave a thumbs up and smiled. Everything was going as planned. "Go!" she whispered. "They could be here any minute."

As Wheatley left the room to get back to work, Chell took a seat in the lobby and calmly and patiently as she could. As far as anyone else, knew, she was only here to greet GLaDOS upon her return, and then take her home. So she had to pretend, for now, that that was what she was here for. All that was left now was to wait.

Fortunately, she didn't have to wait long. She'd only been there for a few minutes when a familiar group of people appeared at the door and headed in. Chell and GLaDOS each spotted each other immediately; neither had to say a word as Chell shot up and rushed into GLaDOS's arms. "Miss me?" GLaDOS mumbled with a giggle. Chell nodded without letting go of her. "I missed you too, Chell."

Pretty quickly, the rest of the group left the room and headed either home or to another part of the building, leaving Chell and GLaDOS in the lobby by themselves. "Should we get going?" GLaDOS asked quietly. Chell took her hand in response, as though she were going to lead her, but began heading away from the door rather than toward it. "What are you doing? Aren't we going home?"

Chell held up a finger to indicate, _wait a second,_ and tightened her grasp on GLaDOS's hand, enough to be detectable but not enough to seem aggressive, and led a confused but cooperative GLaDOS down several familiar hallways. "Where are we going?" GLaDOS asked again, knowing she wouldn't get a response. "Are you trying to show me something?" Chell nodded without turning back. "Should I be concerned...?" Chell shook her head. Then she stopped in front of an already-open chamber door, letting GLaDOS go ahead of her. GLaDOS looked around, wondering what on earth Chell could want to show her in a long-unused test chamber. She glanced across the room to the opposite wall.

Oh.

 _Oh._

As she took a tentative step forward, her eyes fell upon the familiar illustrations on the wall, the ones that depicted her being threatening, deceptive, dishonest. Only, when she looked closer, they weren't the murals she'd grown accustomed to. Here, she could see that they'd been changed. Added onto. Where once she'd been painted threatening Chell, now she was offering her a piece of very real cake. Where once she'd been drawn directing turrets to attack, now she was directing them in serenading a test subject with Cara Mia. S _he remembers the words..._ And as if that weren't enough, a completely new painting had appeared, showing her dedication to her work and to her girlfriend.

GLaDOS was filled suddenly with an overwhelming sense of love and gratitude and reassurance. A synthesized sniffle pierced the silence, and GLaDOS felt Chell's hands gently on her shoulders. "Chell... you did this for me?" Chell nodded again, and GLaDOS turned around abruptly and hugged her tight. She trembled and held onto Chell like her life depended on it, and as the chamber's silence was punctuated with unsteady synthesized breaths, Chell suddenly became very aware that GLaDOS was crying.

That wasn't something she was used to. She couldn't remember a single time GLaDOS had ever cried, much less in front of someone.

"Thank you, Chell... You have no idea how much this means to me... I love you so much."

As the two continued to cling tight to each other, Chell's heart began to pound. She opened her mouth and quietly said, "I love you too."

GLaDOS froze. She glanced up, her own golden optics meeting Chell's smiling, sparkling eyes. "Wait. Did you - say that?"

Chell beamed. "Surprise."

GLaDOS found in that moment that words were failing her. "I... You... That's _my_ thing..."

Chell giggled. "Decided it was time. I used to not see the point in speaking and not being heard. But I knew you'd listen."

"Of course I would. ...Chell? Thank you. For supporting me." GLaDOS felt a rush of energy to her face as she said the words "thank you".

"I'll always support you. I love you. I know it's hard admitting your past mistakes. I can't imagine how hard it must be when you're constantly being reminded of them. So I thought I'd make it so that you would be constantly reminded that I appreciate you and what you're doing now."

The sense of reassurance and relief GLaDOS felt, knowing that she was doing something good, and that Chell would always be there for her, was indescribable. She felt so happy her metaphorical heart could burst, and yet she couldn't stop crying. She looked up at Chell again, and was met with a quick kiss.

"Let's go home now," Chell said, and this time GLaDOS was the one to nod in agreement.

ooo

 **I know. It's short. I cannot squeeze any more words out of my brain. This chapter is two-thirds the length of the previous one, and there is nothing more I can do. But length is going to have to stop pretending it matters, because I had an idea a while ago for a little scene that wasn't long enough to fill out a full chapter, and so I'm going to incorporate "mini-episode" style chapters too.**

 **So look forward to that once this chapter's hopefully-sufficiently-written-about emotions wear off.**

 **~melancholy starlight**


	7. MiniChapter 1: Middle of the night

**random idea hit me past midnight. jotted it down and now it's a mini chapter. think of it like if HN was a show and the chapters were the episodes, this would be a short released outside of the episodes.**

Chapter Seven

"In the middle of the night."

ooo

she woke trembling, with a scream echoing in the back of her voice but falling silent as she registered the dark and quiet room she was in.

the pain didn't feel imaginary, but any trace of it had disappeared from her body.

her heart pounded. her hands were shaking. she sat up with a jolt.

it had hardly been a dream. it was more like reliving a memory that had been slightly distorted. the sights, the sounds, the sensations she had experienced once and never wanted to experience again, were coming back to haunt her in her slumber. feelings of being watched, being trapped, being endangered, being injured, shook her to her very core.

a sob escaped her lips. still under her blankets, she folded her arms on top of her knees and let herself cry. she hadn't had a nightmare like that in months. why now? but she could barely begin to think about why, because her brain couldn't let go of that image. that sound.

"are you okay?" a voice cut off her mind replaying those sounds. as chell looked up to the voice's owner, a wave of relief washed over her.

glados came in from the doorway and sat next to her girlfriend on the bed. "what happened?"

 _nightmare,_ chell responded simply.

"they're back?"

chell nodded.

"i'm sorry. is there anything i can do to help?"

chell didn't respond with signs but instead reached out her arms and pulled glados into a hug. glados was still learning how to be comforting, but this she was certainly familiar with. she returned the action with a gentle, comforting pressure. she felt chell relax in her arms. she thought she ought to say something comforting, too. in a tone so soft and so gentle and so soothing that it was barely recognizable as her own voice, she whispered, "it's alright. nothing is going to hurt you now. you're safe. i'm here. i love you."

chell felt the panic in her chest melt away, replaced with the warmth of love and safety. she didn't let go of glados for a long time. glados didn't mind at all. she had no sleep to get to, not being human, but even if she did, she'd stay awake and stay here to comfort chell for as long as she needed, because she cared about chell.

it still felt a little weird, saying that. admitting she cared about someone. she knew that it most likely felt weird because she was so used to pretending she didn't feel the way humans felt, and she was so often angry or mocking that she was used to being thought of as cold, as cruel, as a word i can't say here if HN is going to stay K+. but the truth was she wasn't any of those things, at the very least not all the time, one might even say not most of the time. and she was getting used to that. getting used to caring about people without feeling like she shouldn't. she was learning to accept the humanity in her. starting with this: her love for chell, which had led her to see things from others' perspectives, taught her that it was okay to feel things and probably better to accept them than to shut them out. honestly, she owed a lot to chell.

"you've done so many wonderful things, and i'm proud of you, and i'm grateful for you. i'll always be here for you."

glados's presence and warmth had comforted chell back into a state of sleepiness, and with the thought of her love in mind, she wasn't afraid to let herself go back to sleep.

ooo

 **gonna take this chance to say my writing has definitely slowed down a bit so i have no idea when the next chapter will be out. but it will exist at some point. i promise. i came up with a bunch of ideas when i first started this fic, and i really love it, so im not going anywhere it just might take awhile because i am both lazy and busy which is a less-than-optimal state. hope you liked this little minichapter, i love fluff, so more of these will probably be in here at some point**


	8. Peace and quiet (Interlude I)

**I can't remember how long this chapter has been in progress. Oops.**

Chapter Eight.

"Peace and quiet."

ooo

The sky was streaked with orange and purple as the sun began to dip below the horizon. This quiet Saturday evening was, as far as Chell could tell, not particularly eventful. She lay on the living room floor for no apparent reason, staring at the ceiling and thinking about dinner. She _could_ simply get up and make it, but where was the fun in that?

In the next room over, she could hear GLaDOS humming a cheery little tune. It was all too familiar a song to Chell; she'd heard plenty of versions of it over the past year. She grinned as she heard GLaDOS sing the words to the next line—"But there's no sense crying over every mistake"—and then fall silent for a brief moment.

Chell giggled to herself and responded before her girlfriend had a chance to finish it herself. "You just keep on trying till you run out of cake!"

Hidden from Chell's view behind the closed door, GLaDOS beamed. _She's singing my song with me!_ She cracked the door open and poked her head out to look at Chell. "I hear you singing my song, and I feel obligated to remind you that it is a solo," she teased.

"I love you too~!" Chell singsonged, knowing with total certainty that what GLaDOS meant was that she was genuinely ecstatic that Chell was not only singing _for_ her, but singing _with_ her, a song that she _wrote_. Chell's singing voice was something she had never heard until recently, and she fell faster in love with it every second she heard it.

But right now, something else had grabbed Chell's attention. She sat up to get a better, less-upside-down view of the AI standing in the doorway. "...Your hair looks different."

"I'm trying something new with it. Did you know that I can change its length at will?" Indeed, she had exchanged her usual chin-length, half-clipped-back hairstyle with a longer, wavier one, reaching a little past her shoulders. On each side she had braided a small section and tied them together at the back, and to top it all off she had placed, on the right side of her head, her signature Aperture hairclip—excuse me, I meant her Aperture Brand Aperture Logo Dual-Clip Hair Accessory. :)

"I thought it would be a pointless feature," she continued. "What would it matter? Physical appearance is entirely unimportant to the furthering of science. But I thought I'd experiment with it anyway, out of curiosity. What do you think?"

Chell couldn't stop staring. Her expression unreadable, her voice (predictably) silent, she took in every detail. The tiny, symmetrical braids; the loose, swooping curls; the smooth snow-white shine. Chell was amazed—she hadn't thought she could be more in love, but now she stood corrected. "...I love it." A smile spread across her face as she scramble to her feet, to embrace her love, and kiss her on her beautiful face.

"Careful," GLaDOS protested gently, "you wouldn't believe how long those braids took me. I've... never had to do something like that before." But she returned Chell's embrace with an immediate eagerness, knowing no matter what happened she wouldn't trade Chell's kiss for anything.

"Do you... want to practice on me?" Chell murmured, gently taking GLaDOS's hands in her own.

"You'd let me?"

"Of course. Sit there, and I'll go in front of you and you can do my hair." Chell grinned and sat on the floor as GLaDOS situated herself behind her.

"Say something if I'm pulling too hard. I don't want to hurt you."

"You won't," Chell reassured her gently. She took a deep, relaxed breath, and as GLaDOS's small, slender fingers gently divided Chell's hair into sections, they both felt a deep sense of calm.

"Yesterday I was looking at how to French braid," GLaDOS mumbled as she worked. "This is my first time trying it." She let out an expressive, simulated sigh. "I'd never admit this to anyone else, but... I'm so used to only needing to do things I can control through my chassis, that things like this are hard to get used to. Human things, like hand-writing things out on paper? I can visualize how to do it perfectly. But in practice, it's not so easy."

"Well, for being so new at things like that, you're really good at it," Chell commented. "Not anyone could pick up a pen for the first time in their life and make it look that pretty."

A little energy wave rushed to GLaDOS's face. _She likes my handwriting._

"Your hair is so soft," GLaDOS hummed. "I could run my fingers through it forever..." Hmm. Maybe 'forever' wasn't the right word to say. She'd once thought she was going to run Chell through tests forever. Maybe she should stop saying the word 'forever', forever.

"You can go as long as you like," Chell assured her, unaware of her silent panic. "It feels nice."

Relief flooded through GLaDOS as she began intertwining sections of hair—gently, but tightly enough to be tidy—and Chell closed her eyes and smiled, focusing on the slow, relaxing motions. Listening to the soft rustle of her hair in her lover's careful fingers, she took in the peacefulness of the moment. Quietness this close to silence used to unsettle her, but now it was soothing.

And now it was over.

A sharp knock at the door shattered the silence. GLaDOS rolled her eyes. "I'll give you three guesses who _that_ is."

Chell sighed as she reoriented herself and shuffled to her feet to answer the door. "I know you don't get along with Wheatley, but firstly you don't know it's him—"

"Who else would it be?" GLaDOS interjected.

"—and secondly you don't have to act like his mere existence inconveniences you."

"But it does! I'm busy doing science, and the moment that little moron takes one step into the room, something goes wrong."

"You know he doesn't mean any of it," Chell argued as she opened the door. "Hi."

Wheatley started talking just about the moment he saw Chell through the doorway. "Oh, brilliant! You _are_ here! How's your day been? I'm not interrupting anything am I?"

"Yes," GLaDOS called from the living room.

"It's fine," Chell insisted before anyone could voice any more concerns. She turned back to meet Wheatley's eyes. "What happened to your glasses?"

Wheatley winced for a moment at the pointing of Chell's index finger, but relaxed once he realized she was simply gesturing toward one lens of his glasses, which appeared to have been cracked in half in its frame. "Oh, uhh, there may have been a... small incident in the gel labs," he responded hesitantly. "It's nothing major! Nothing major, nothing at all. It's all under control now—"

"Please tell me it's all been cleaned up by now and the lab is _not_ in total chaos," GLaDOS pleaded.

"Everything's fine! Everything's under control," Wheatley repeated. "The only issue now is there's a part of my field of vision that's perpetually smudged. Minor inconvenience, you know, somewhat annoying, just one obscured part of my sight that you can't exactly just blink it away. But, you know. It's fine."

"Did you need something, or can we go back to what we were doing?" GLaDOS demanded.

"Oh! Right, right. I _did_ come here for a reason." He held up a flyer printed on bright yellow paper depicting a paintbrush and palette. "They're having an art contest, and I thought you might like to sign up!"

"...Art contest?" Chell glanced at GLaDOS, the subject of her most recent piece. Her expression said everything.

"I'm sure you could do it." GLaDOS would've been blushing, if she had that ability. "Your murals are so beautiful. I didn't know you could paint like that."

"I... didn't either, actually." Chell couldn't remember what had guided her hand when she had created those murals. Instinct? Guesswork? Luck? Could she do it again? "No harm in trying, though, I guess."

"You'll do great." GLaDOS assured her.

"And we'll be by your side supporting you the whole time!" Wheatley chimed in. "You can do anything, Chell!"

Chell grinned. "Then I'll do it!"

ooo

 **finally i finished it! it's probably really scattered so i apologize, i just sort of wanted to incorporate these concepts like the thing with glados's hair, and build up to an upcoming chapter, so i just sort of tossed it all together.**

 **also! i took a couple of chapter requests on tumblr and would like to assure those people that those are in the works! I havent forgotten ahaha**

 **till next chapter,**

 **~melancholy starlight**


	9. Flashback 2: It's the little things

**(From a list of '100 ways to say I love you', I have been taking requests to base minichapters on some of them. Thanks to tumblr user cakes-fun-and-portal-guns for requesting number 76: "I want you to have this.")**

Chapter Nine.

"It's the little things."

ooo

It had been only a few weeks since Chell had freed herself from the maze of test chambers that had held her captive for she-didn't-know-how-long. Slowly, she had been warming up to GLaDOS's presence. She hadn't let her guard down, still backing away at any attempts at physical contact (which GLaDOS was fine with—she had expected as much, under the circumstances. But it was worth a shot.)

But Chell was beginning to realize that GLaDOS genuinely didn't intend to harm her. In fact, she seemed hyper-aware of everything that might remind Chell of the testing, not wanting to cause the former subject any more discomfort. She would try to stay away from surveillance cameras. She would avoid letting any unsettling silences fall. She would even change out of her Aperture uniform before meeting up with Chell. This was entirely unrelated to testing; she wanted to make that muchj clear. So she did everything in her power to keep all things testing out of the picture.

GLaDOS ran a comb through her synthetic, pearl-white hair one more time. She was as ready as she could be. It was a little strange—she'd never felt this anxious before. Or, arguably, any level of anxious at all. She hadn't known she could feel that way before Chell. She was still getting used to it.

Well, she'd have plenty of time to now, she thought as she began the walk to the meeting place they'd agreed on: a cozy little café just a few blocks from Aperture's main building.

ooo

Chell's return to the outside world was a little disorienting. She'd fought for so long to return to it, her memories of her life starting to fade with each test chamber longer she remained in the facility. Maybe it was something in the air. But now that she'd returned to her home, started settling back into her real life... Her days—years? weeks maybe?—in Aperture felt like a fast-fading fever dream.

Sort of. Within a couple of weeks it felt like an eternity since she'd actually been in the test chambers. But the repercussions of testing—the paranoia, the aversion to surveillance cameras, the fear of silence, the nightmares—those refused to fade.

But that wasn't what today was about. Supposedly. GLaDOS had made it quite clear that she didn't want to continue holding Chell as a test subject. She wanted to know her as a person, as a friend. (Maybe more.) Her fears kept her hesitant, but the AI's intentions seemed genuine, so Chell had decided to give her a chance anyway. But she promised herself, for her own safety, to back out at the first sign of something bad.

Luckily for GLaDOS, that first sign hadn't shown itself yet. As she approached the café she caught sight of the familiar dark ponytail, the sparkling blue eyes, brighter in the afternoon sun than they'd ever been in the depths of the labs.

"Hello," GLaDOS greeted her plainly.

 _Hi,_ Chell responded. _Should we go inside?_

"Sure. Do you want me to order you something?" She fidgeted with the end of her sweater sleeve as they walked through the door.

 _I can do it. Thanks._

When Chell returned with her drink, GLaDOS met her emotionally-neutral gaze with a faint smile. "Hey."

 _Hi. Do you want anything?_ Chell paused with a confused expression as she thought about her question. _Wait_.

"I don't need anything. I _can_. But I don't choose to. Honestly, I don't know why the scientists felt it necessary to include that feature... But enough about that. How have you been doing?"

 _I'm okay. It's just like it's always been. Wheatley visits sometimes. He means well, but he's less careful around the topic of..._ She paused. _...testing._

GLaDOS felt a little surge of energy rush through her at the word. Changethesubjectchangethesubjectchangethesubject, she urged herself. "He's not very careful about anything, honestly. I've cleaned up more of his messes than are worth counting. 47. But enough about him. What do you enjoy doing with your time?"

Chell's expression, apprehensive just a second ago, softened with relief as she began her response. _It's quiet at home. I've started learning to play ukulele to fill the silence._ She laughed quietly. _But I'm not very good yet._

"You'll get there. What drew you to that particular instrument?"

 _Easier than guitar._

They both laughed a little. Chell noticed that this conversation, though not particularly deep, was unusually ple"asant given their background. GLaDOS seemed to care what Chell had to say. And she hadn't said anything about testing, which was quite the change of pace from when testing was the only circumstance she spoke to Chell at all. Had that been intentional? Maybe GLaDOS had been telling the truth.

"I play too. I've written my own songs. Why don't we play together?"

 _That sounds fun. We should plan that soon._ Chell let a smile appear on her face. Somehow, it seemed like the voice in the chambers had been an entirely different entity altogether. That voice hadn't been considerate or inviting. That voice wouldn't have listened or responded to her if she tried to speak to it.

Chell continued to notice that. GLaDOS continued to ask her questions, consider her responses, avoid topics that made her uncomfortable. Somehow, this solitary semihuman scientist seemed more socially perceptive than a normal person. Chell was surprised, honestly, that GLaDOS was so cautious. She hadn't initially seemed like the type to care how her words affected people. Chell wondered if it had just been that "testing protocol" she had always mentioned, but even in a non-professional context when she spoke to Aperture scientists or even strangers, she wasn't nearly as considerate as she was with Chell.

The weeks continued to pass. Chell and GLaDOS met up frequently, talked about people they knew and things they did and feelings they had. And of course, as promised, they played music together. They took turns, they played duets, sometimes GLaDOS would sing and let Chell play. Chell liked that the best—she had to admit, GLaDOS was a lovely singer.

One rather chilly evening as the pair made their way from a well-lit, bustling shopping center to the little park across the street, a particularly strong gust of wind kicked up and GLaDOS found herself being clung to for warmth, in turn causing an energy wave to shoot through her that made her internal processes accelerate and generate more heat. Her face displaying her equivalent of blushing heavily, she glanced to the woman beside her, who had normally been a bit standoffish but now didn't seem to have even thought twice about whose hand she clasped.

GLaDOS tried to quiet her racing mind and heart as she spoke. "There's a bench over there. Why don't we sit for awhile?"

Chell nodded, refusing to let go of her computer companion though the wind began to settle down. "Do you want my coat? Technically, I don't need it." GLaDOS could barely recognize the tone in her own voice as she pulled sleeves off her arms. Chell nodded again, and let GLaDOS sort of wrap the coat over her shoulders. The android sighed. "I guess I'm too small to share with... I never understood that decision. Or any of the decisions the scientists made about my outward appearance, for that matter."

 _What is it like being an android?_

"Well... It's all I've ever known, so it's completely normal to me. My brain is more powerful than any computer ever built. I have access to nearly all the information in the world. And for some reason the scientists decided to make me human-shaped, but not human-colored, so I always get asked questions and I'm simply too complex to explain to the average person." She paused. "But you certainly aren't average."

GLaDOS thought she saw a slight grin from an otherwise unresponsive Chell, but maybe it was too dark to tell for sure.

"Oh, and I can essentially silence certain emotions if they're in my way. Though I've... been trying to break that habit."

 _What do you mean?_

"My mind was based on that of a human. As a result, that human's capabilities of emotion and empathy had infuence over my own thoughts. However, I quickly discovered my own capacity to ignore them outright. So I did, for a long time. Emotions were distracting, complicated, useless, and unmistakably human. And needless to say, I'm not human. I didn't need human emotions. So I pretended they weren't there.

"I thought the best solution to a problem was usually the easiest one. But this solution stopped working after a long time. My deeply buried empathy decided it had had enough, and demanded I let myself care about people. I physically couldn't suppress it, or anything else, any longer. As it turns out, emotions do have a purpose, and the one I felt first was the one that told me I'd been doing the wrong thing all along. The second one showed me the truth about how I felt about you. After that, I'd made up my mind. I needed to make amends. I needed to make it up to you, somehow."

She noticed that her gaze had drifted, her voice had trailed, and her mind had slipped ever so slightly off topic. "...I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring all of that into the conversation. Generally I try not to, but I got carr—"

 _It's okay. I understand. ...I can tell you how to make it up._

"What?" GLaDOS asked, an expression of confusion rather than surprise.

 _I don't want anyone else to have to feel as afraid and helpless as I felt. I felt so alone and uncared for that I didn't even speak, because I didn't think anyone would respond. I don't want future test subjects to feel that way._

Still not meeting Chell's eyes, GLaDOS nodded. "I understand."

 _You're the one responsible for the testing center, right? You can make it happen._

"And I will. I promise. I'll do everything in my power." She still couldn't bring herself to make eye contact with Chell. "I won't silence my empathy anymore."

She meant what she said, but she admittedly was still getting used to these things being important to her. Fortunately, though, she'd demonstrated exactly the sort of character development Chell was looking for, because later that night when she walked Chell to her front door Chell motioned for her to come in.

The actual coming-in part wasn't new. This was the same living room they spent hours playing music to each other in. But GLaDOS had planned to just make sure Chell got home safe and then leave. Apparently Chell had one more thing in store.

 _Don't leave yet. Let me grab something._

GLaDOS closed the door behind her as she watched Chell dig through a few drawers in her kitchen and then her desk. Once she found what she was looking for, she kept her hand closed tightly around it until she lifted GLaDOS's left hand, palm up, and dropped the shiny silver object into it.

 _I want you to have this._

"This is a key." Chell nodded. "To your front door?" Chell nodded again. "And you want me to have it."

 _I think I can trust you. I can tell that you don't want to hurt me. And I enjoy your company._

If GLaDOS had an organic heart it would be pounding out of her chest. "...Thank you."

 _You're welcome. I'll see you tomorrow._

ooo

 **I'm actually quite proud of this chapter. Apologies for the wait, especially to the person who requested this one.**

 **A lot of talk about the scientists' decisions on GLaDOS's physical appearance this time around. That wasn't intentional. I'm thinking throughout the series she'll just bring it up and there will never be an in-universe explanation for said decisions.**

 **I should go to bed. Next chapter will most likely be the other request. God knows when I'll finish it.**

 **~melancholy starlight**


	10. MiniChapter 2: Always in my mind

**(From a list of '100 ways to say I love you', I've been taking requests for HN minichapters. Thanks to tumblr user whcatley for requesting this one: "It reminded me of you.")**

Chapter Ten.

"Always on my mind."

ooo

The morning after Chell's suddenly-returned nightmare, she awoke only barely remembering it for a moment before it all flooded back. She still had no clue what had prompted her unconscious brain to bring that back. But she could ignore it. She could pretend it had never happened - and in fact, she planned to. She didn't want to focus on that paralyzing fear, that choking silence before the bursts of earsplitting noise preceding what would have been a bloody, painful death. She didn't want to focus on the negative aspects of something her brain had manufactured, when she could instead think about the positive aspects of something that had actually happened. She remembered waking up in tears as the imagined pain dissolved, and not a second later GLaDOS had been by her side, asking what had happened and how she could help. She remembered the softness, the warmth, the safety of GLaDOS's embrace. And she remembered the amazingly humanlike tone GLaDOS's voice had taken on as she soothed her.

There had been times early on when Chell doubted GLaDOS's true motives, when she worried whether the AI was really concerned for Chell's happiness or for her own personal gain. After all, this was the same - person? - who had trapped and teased and endangered Chell for what could have been weeks or months or years. How did she know GLaDOS even understood love?

But it was moments like that night, enveloped in GLaDOS's gentle embrace, hearing her whispered reassurances, seeing her immediate response, that proved that she meant every word. Her voice had become so quiet and warm and soothing, so unbelievably and uncharacteristically human. You simply couldn't fake that.

So when she would get texts from GLaDOS containing links to various love songs with the message "This reminded me of you", she knew it was genuine.

As Chell opened her phone to find a new one at the top of her messages, she had to wonder what GLaDOS was doing finding love songs on YouTube and sending them to her when she was allegedly meant to be overseeing test construction and whatnot, but she wasn't about to question an unexpected cute message and a pretty song in the middle of and otherwise rather uneventful afternoon. Smiling, she listened to the song, read the lyrics, and added it to an ever-growing playlist entitled "the love of my life". She let the playlist loop for the next few hours. Some of the first ones she'd ever received she had now heard so many times she knew all the words by heart. She hummed along as she opened a new tab on unspecified mobile internet browser. She wanted to do something for GLaDOS in return, and decided to look for a gift for her. It didn't take her long to find something - her heart melted when she saw the way the color and sparkle resembled her eyes. We should have something to match each other, she thought, and bought two of them, each in a different, but perfect color.

It was a couple of days later when they arrived. Chell and GLaDOS were returning home from an outing when Chell said quietly, "I'm going to go check the mail. I'll meet you up there, okay?"

"You don't want me to wait for you?" GLaDOS asked. It wasn't a big deal, but it was a little strange.

"I'll be fine," Chell reassured her. She pulled the AI closer and kissed her gently. "It'll just be a couple minutes. You go on ahead."

"If you say so," GLaDOS said, hesitating to let go of Chell's hand before heading up the steps to Chell's front door. She unlocked the door, closing it behind her but deciding to leave it unlocked for Chell. She sat sideways on the couch, back against the armrest (I guess "gays being unable to sit normally" extends to cores too) and, not needing to resort to such human entertainment as turning on the TV, decided to play and sing one of the many songs she'd written. The moment she finished the last line, she heard the doorknob turning. It was like they were mentally connected - though GLaDOS swore she wasn't telepathic. That would be incredibly advanced, even for Aperture.

"I have something for you," Chell announced as she came in. "Look at these."

She held her hand out to reveal two silver rings, one a little smaller and bearing a sparkling blue gemstone, the other with a glowing golden orange one. She held up the orange one. "This one reminded me of you. Of your eyes."

GLaDOS picked up the blue one, knowing it would better fit her slender fingers. "I was just going to say this one looked like yours." Chell grinned as GLaDOS put hers on. "Chell, it's so beautiful! I love it."

"I love _you_ ," Chell responded, pulling her girlfrend into a tight hug.

"I love you too," GLaDOS murmured. They stood in each other's arms for awhile, starting to sway side to side, and not planning to let go for a long time.

ooo

 **Hey hi it's been a hot second but i felt bad about not having this up because it was a request but it took me million years to decide where to take it OOPS so i'm sorry whcatley that it took so long!!!**

 **speaking of things taking a long time, i don't have any more chapters in progress. hopefully i can pump something out because i'd like to honor this fic's one year of release next-ish month i think. but we'll see.**

 **i am working on another portal fic in addition!! it is based on my blog aperturesciencecoreresearchteam and while it may not get posted for quite awhile i wanted to let you know that i am still writing at least a little bit haha**

 **ok long notes are cheating at wordcount bye**


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